The Loss Of An Assumed Future

Happy *almost* 3 day weekend!  I'm looking forward to sleeping in so long as Murphy allows it, BBQing and getting a few runs in.  I have a 5K next weekend and the following :)

 

I was browsing Pinterest last night and came across this quote:

 

"Infertility is a loss. 

It's the loss of a dream. 

It's the loss of an assumed future. 

And, like every loss, it will be grieved."

 

"It's the loss of an assumed future."  A light kind of went off in my head.  This perfectly describes how I feel about not having the chance to be a Mom.  I've known for so long that I can't, so it was never really a "lifelong dream" to be a Mom.  For some, it is but for me, not so much. 

 

I think I fear/dislike having to explain to people when they ask "So, when are you having kids?" or how to react to "Oh you'll understand when you have your own."  I'm shy as it is and I just don't feel like explaining the whole situation to everyone who asks.  Most of the people in my life know and I know the ones who don't know are just innocently asking.

 

I understand egg donation and adoption is a possibility but it's actually not when you don't have the finances for it.

 

On another note, since June, my husband's 18 year old daughter has been living with us, working and starting community college next week.  While this wasn't easy for me at first and I'm still adjusting (she moved in 1 month after we returned from our honeymoon), in a way, I definitely feel that everything happens for a reason.  I married Saro obviously knowing he is a Dad and the girls living with us was open for them to decide.

 

Maybe this is part of my "calling."  Maybe it is not to birth a child and be a Mom to a baby, toddler, adolescent.  Maybe it is to be a positive role model to a teenager/soon to be adult and be someone she can look up to and feel comfortable asking questions.

 

If anyone reading is a step parent, what have your experiences been like?

 

 

Paint Nite

Last night we went to Paint Nite for my friend's 30th birthday.  If you haven't heard of it or tried it, the company hosts painting parties at local pubs/restaurants.  There were about 30-40 people there.  Everyone paints the same picture and the instructor goes step by step.  They provide all of the materials you need.

 

It was so cool and also interesting to see everyone's art work.  Definitely check it out if they're offered in your area.  I would do it again for sure!  Currently, Living Social and Groupon have deals for Paint Nite for $25 (versus $45).

 

Here is how mine came out:

 



 



 

Group shot!

 

 



 

New Layout & Piyo Results

I love my new blog layout!  What do you guys think?!  

 

Contact Ashley @ The Grits Blog if you need a blog facelift!  :)

So yesterday, I completed 8 full weeks of Piyo.  I decided to get gutsy and post my photo results because that's the only way to really describe it.  I mean this is a fitness blog, no?  I have not weighed or measured myself.  I honestly don't think I lost weight but I definitely think I lost inches.  I have less back fat which is a plus!

 

 

With the 6 Piyo workouts per week, I've also been running between 4-6 miles/week.  I'm going to continue on with the next 8 weeks of Piyo.  I just got the 2 extra Strength workouts and "slides" which are really tough!

 

I've been pretty good with eating although it could always be better.

Have a great week!

What's On My Nightstand

Today is my Friday - woohoooo!

I got this post idea from Kristyn :)

What's on my nightstand:

• A small lamp from Ikea
• A book
• Ear plugs (Husband and dog snore)
• Small jewelry box for my rings
• Chap stick
• Tissues
• iPad
• Glass of water

So exciting, I know.  I'm having major writer's block lately.  Not much has been going on!

Oh, I cut more hair off last night.  That makes 3 hair cuts in 3 months.  It literally grows like a weed, which I guess is a good thing.  Left is the night before our wedding and right is last night.



The Random Things

1.)  I am currently upset at whichever neighbor called the town to report us building our shed.  It can only be one of two neighbors because where the shed sits in our yard, it's up against their property line, too.  We followed the guidelines and obtained a permit but they still called which led to the town's building inspector come by (while we weren't home, of course) who left us a notice claiming "unauthorized to build."  But, we did have a permit - just not posted on the shed (they told us it wasn't necessary to do so).  Since living there, we haven't been too pleased with our neighbors in general and I guess I always compare it to my old neighborhood.  Which brings me to #2...

 

2.)  I'm looking forward to a 3 day weekend ahead which includes a night in AC (the newest and nicest resort casino is closing in 2 weeks along with 2 others) with the husband and our 10th annual block party (at my Mom's, where I lived from 1998-2011).  My Mom lives for the block party.  She's usually in charge of planning it, getting everyone together, and while I don't live there anymore, it's usually a day where I get to see a lot of my friends in the same place.  So, I'm excited for that and the weather is supposed to be nice.

 

3.)  I am on week #8 of Piyo and going strong.  Since starting on July 1st, I've only missed one workout.  If I do miss a day due to other stuff going on or if I have plans after work, I double up the following day.

 

Still no weight loss whatsoever.  I had my yearly gyno check up last week and weighed in at 158 on the doctor's scale.  I told her what I eat on a regular basis and she seemed surprised as to why I'm not losing any weight considering I exercise 6 days a week.  She told me to add more cardio.  I then explained my low back issue.  Piyo does contain a decent amount of cardio, plus I've been running 2x a week @ 2-3 miles each.  I don't want to do much more than that since my sciatica has been acting up again.

 

We've been having beautiful weather here in northern NJ so last night after Piyo Core, I decided to go out for a jog.  I really wanted to run 2 miles in 20 minutes or less and guess what my time was?

 

20:08.

 

I blame the hills in my neighborhood!  The last 1/2 mile was all uphill.  If it were flat, I definitely would have finished in around 19:00.

 

 

 

 



The Summer Project: Part 2

See Part 1 of our summer project here.

 

Over the weekend, Saro added rocks and dirt around the base of the shed and finished the shingles while I painted.  It came primed which was good!  We aimed to match the house but the color is a little too blue.  Our house is gray.  We like it though!  It took me a solid 4 hours to paint 2 coats of gray and 1 coat of the white trim (Saro did the first coat of trim). 

 

 

 

 I just have to take the edge brush and finish the edges with the blue/gray.  I got as close as I could with the roller.  I much prefer the roller from painting the trim with a small brush!

 

The Summer Project: Part 1

After living in our house for 2 & 1/2 years, we decided it was time for a shed.  Oh the exciting things that happen as a homeowner!  Meh.

 

We have a full unfinished basement for storage but it's not convenient for large items like - the lawn mower, outdoor furniture, snow blower, and other lawn/garden tools.

 

We went back and forth between having one built and having them drop it in our yard but it would cost almost double and we'd have to remove our fence for the truck to get to where the shed was going.

 

We decided on this pre-fab shed from Costco.  The price was right and Saro wanted a summer project, or so he thought, ha!  We really liked the look of this shed versus other barn looking sheds from Home Depot, Lowe's, etc.

 

We Saro are is ALMOST done with it.  BUT, I did help a little by climbing the ladder (hate that), holding things in place, and even using the hammer and screw gun - yay me!  Ha, reading that manual was like reading a different language to me.  Why is a 6 foot piece of wood called a double zero??  Why are some pieces nailed and others screwed?  Beats the heck outta me.

 

Anyway, here are the progress pictures thus far.  Lacking a picture with the roof shingles but we just have to paint it and then plant some stuff around it!  Finished product photos to follow!

 

Leveling out the area.

This was annoying.

Dripping sweat.  Good workout though.

Murphy wasn't much of a help.

Assuring it's level!

Hey Murph!

Measure, measure, do some math, measure.

The base.

Floor base.

Side View

He layed pea gravel for more support

Walls are up!

See?  Helping.

"Hmm, what's next?"

 

All in all, we would recommend this shed.  Saro just wishes he had more consecutive time to work on it rather than a day here, a day there.  Some steps definitely require 2 people. Others, not so much.

 

Thrifty Thursday

Happy Friday Eve!

 

Here's a pretty good deal I got at Rite Aid on Sunday.  These items I will only buy on sale.

 

2 Ban deodorants - On sale 2 for $5

2 Caress body wash - On sale $2.99 ea.

2 Honey Nut Cheerios - On sale 2 for $4

 

Subtotal: $14.98

 

Manufacturer coupons used:

One $1 off coupon for the Ban, two $1 off Caress body wash and one $1 off Cheerios.

 

Grand total: $10.98

Savings from original prices: $16.96

 

I received a $3 catalina coupon off my next $30 or more purchase.

 

This deal is still good through Saturday.

 

I tend to clip coupons from the newspaper each Sunday morning.  I only clip coupons for items we actually use and keep them in a categorized envelope until I'm ready to use them. 

 

I use Living Rich With Coupons often.

 

 



Recent Runs #DJV5K

I am unhappy to report that my sciatica is acting up again.  I don't know if it's from running recently, Piyo, my new sneakers (same model as my old ones but not broken in yet), or all of the above.  However, when I was on Pinterest last night, I was searching for sciatica relief and most of the stretches/poses are included in Piyo so once again I'm convinced it's from running.

 

On Saturday, the husband and I ran 3.1 and on Sunday I went for a walk and then ran 1 mile.

 

8/2/2014:

Distance: 3.1 mi

Time: 33:35

Pace: 10:50 min/mi

 

8/3/2014:

Distance: 1 mi

Time: 9:52 min/mi

 

Last night I slept with a pillow between my legs and that seemed to relieve the pain a little bit.  I still have a tingling pain that runs down to the bottom of my left foot.  Ugh.

 

I saw an infomercial the other day for Be Active Brace.  It's a brace that you wear under your knee and it's supposed to help with sciatica.  On one site, there were 250 reviews and most of them were pretty good.  Maybe I'll give it a shot.

 

For now, I'm sticking to Piyo (I'm on week #6) and running 1-2x a week but only 2 miles.  It seems that when I run more than that, the pain comes back.

 

I do still plan on running the town 5K on 9/6 and the virtual 5K on 9/13!